The After Excuse

I will do it. Just after ….

  • I have completed my studies.
  • I have saved enough.
  • I have had children.
  • I get married.
  • I get my dream job.
  • I have my own place.

How often do we put things off until “after”? Moving forward to do something we claim we want to do, is put off because it is not the “right time”. I recall having a discussion many years ago with my godfather on decorating the space I lived in. I told him I could not wait until I had my own place to decorate the way I wanted (at that time purple and hunter’s green were my favourite colours). His response? Why wait – decorate your own bedroom as if it is your tiny flat. I took him up on the challenge and created a purple-coloured haven for myself which, once I moved out on my own, I transferred to a new home.

Sometimes we wait for “after”, and the wait goes on for many years. The after excuse seems to create an inertia which is almost welcome as we do not take the risks involved in moving on, or do not step out into the unknown. It is a hard habit to break; and one I catch myself doing at times. (At the moment I catch myself saying: “When I have a permanent position, I will …”)

Instead of focusing on “after”, let us focus on “while”: what can we do while waiting for the perfect home, or that dream job. In this way we can live in the present and not constantly look forward into the future; we can enjoy what we are currently experiencing instead of wishing for it to pass quickly.

What “after” excuse are you currently using?

(This post was inspired by the Five Minute Friday prompt: After)

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31 thoughts on “The After Excuse

  1. These were thoughts similar I was also going to post, yet when I started typing my mind went off on another path entirely…Love these thoughts…”Instead of focusing on “after”, let us focus on “while”‘

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  2. Dear Colline
    Excellent advice we can all do well to heed. We only have this moment we can live and love and be. Hope you are having a few more purple rooms.
    Blessings

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  3. Very true. Reminds me of a gimmick which went the rounds of the motivational lectures a while back. You were given a circle of paper with TUIT printed on it, and then told that as you now had a round TUIT you should promptly complete all the jobs you had been putting off until you got a round TUIT!.

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    1. Fear certainly plays a role though we would not like to admit it. To step out and achieve our dreams does require us, I think, to step out of our comfort zone and change what we are used to.

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  4. So true. And thinking of what one can do while in the ‘while’ keeps boredom at bay, and perhaps makes one better prepared for that future he/she is dreaming about. ๐Ÿ™‚

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  5. Hi Colline! I share your perspective very much. Often, we only learn this when we are older and only after we have experienced some of life’s hard knocks! I write about this quite a bit, actually. Feel free to read a few of my posts on this theme;
    “Life in Ordinary Time” (3/11)
    “Seismic Shifts and Cosmic Changes” (3/3)
    “Staying Present” (1/21)

    I really like your blog and I am looking forward to reading your other posts!

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