I am watching my daughter grow and I see her searching for her identity. She is trying out a variety of sports that she never had the confidence to play before; she is beginning to find her own style of dressing; she is beginning to reflect on issues that a younger child never speaks about.
As I see her going through this process, I remember my own experiences. The search for my own identity peaked once I had finished high school and was able to escape the restricting confines of rules and expectations housed there. It was truly at university that I was able to discover what I believed in and what issues I could be passionate about. Within the free-thinking environment, I was able to grow not only intellectually but also in confidence and self-esteem.
When I married it seemed my own identity took a back seat for a while: it seemed to hide behind that of my husband’s, and later those of my children. For a while I lost myself; a loss I have noticed many women experience when they change their status from single to married. After a few years of marriage, however, I found “me” again – instead it was a “me” that encompassed the words “wife” and “mother”.
Moving to another country has also required another search into myself for who I am. As with each occurrence in life, I have found my identity has become more rounded and richer with each experience.
In what ways did you search for your identity?
© Colline Kook-Chun, 2012
(Join me in the Five Minute Friday Challenge hosted by The Gypsy Mama. Participants write for 5 minutes with no editing, no over thinking, and no backtracking. This week’s prompt is: Identity)